Coping With The Loss Of Family Members

- - - - - dead wife dead child dead parent dead sibling

#1
theglassintheguvseye

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There's been a great deal of talk about Rick and his evolution/devolution or whatever you consider it over the seasons.

 

I have been pondering how each person dealt with post apocalyptic losses.

 

First, we have Morgan.  Lost his wife.  Couldn't kill her shell.  Lost his son to his wife.  Lost his ever loving mind and killed everyone on sight.

 

Then there's Andrea.  Knew her parents were gone most likely.  Lost her sister to a walker. Finished her off.  Wanted to die at the CDC.  Dale drags her out of there.  Wants Michonne to leave her to save herself.  Finds Woodbury.  IMO, sacrifices self for 2 groups of people while trying to make peace/change and then kill Phillip.  Dies.

 

Dr. Jenner chooses to die in the CDC bldg after losing his wife??  (been a while)

 

The Governor lost wife before ZA, has Penny left.  Penny gets bitten and he keeps her "alive" hoping for a cure.  Gives into his narcissistic tendencies, uses his charisma to dupe a cult following into some atrocious acts and is ruthless to all who could possibly upset his little Utopia.

 

Carol loses her asshole husband, then her daughter.  She becomes a fairly pragmatic, if over reactive partial leader of the prison.

 

Herschel lost his wife, his neighbors and kept them in a barn hoping for a cure.  He kept on being Herschel but lost faith that the walkers could be human again. Sure, he pulled off a bender but after that remained steady.  And he got Dale's moral compass role.

 

Daryl lost Merle and I have no idea how he feels about it.

 

Rick first almost lost his life to a bunch of toothless rednecks in the line of duty.  Woke up, got bonked in the head by Duane, held hostage and then tended to by Morgan.  Lost Lori in a Biblical sense to his best friend.  Found his family.  Almost lost Carl to Otis' bullet.  Gained some new family at the Greene farm.  Found out about Lori and Shane.  Had to kill his best friend in order to save himself.  Lost lots of "family", in the form of group members (friends are family to me).  Lost his wife for his or Shane's child + what's his name's deer prank. Saw men try to rape his son, bit a throat out.  Had his "home" destroyed while still trying to make peace.  Lost Herschel, a father figure. Now he's lost Bob because he made a dumb ass move in that basement for a little food.

 

I know that as leader of the group, he has more burdens to bear and I think he's okay, considering all that has transpired and YES, he has annoyed me from time to time but really, I think he's doing pretty damn well. Everyone handles emotional stress differently. 

 

How do you think you would fare in each of these situations?  Or in general? I would probably be somewhere between Rick and Carol. I'd like to say I'd be more like Herschel but that's just not how I react to dangerous situations as a rule.

 

ETA Michonne lost her child and boyfriend and got a little weird for a good while but survived and became human again.  I may have forgotten more.


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#2
limaro

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I like your analysis! Great to be reminded of all Rick and co. have been through.

 

I really sympathize with Michonne's journey.  That's how I see me going at first.  The pain of losing everyone would put me in a dark and lonely place.  I'm naturally introverted and independent to a fault. So I would almost certainly wind up shell shocked, grieving and alone for a while. But needing to survive, I would fight hard and not care much for pre- ZA rules and morals.

 

Assuming I could develop some survival skills, eventually the solitude would lose it's appeal and I'd start looking for company.  Michonne seems to have settled in with Rick's group, emotionally bonding with Carl and getting closer to everyone.  I don't think I'd be able to get close to people again.   I'd be very distant for a long time.  A bit of the early Daryl thrown in  there.  Wanting to be contributing and needed, but still not wanting to need anyone else.  I'd want to be on the fringes of a group, but not getting close enough to hurt when there were losses.

My moral compass would point very much the way Rick's does.  I'd defend my  group by whatever means necessary.  I'd try to help others who did not present a threat.

 

....Until a mysterious stranger with demons of his own rides into our settlement, sees through my icy façade, and warms the heart I thought long dead...  Oh wait!  I'm not writing fanfic?  Sorry my bad!  :wallmad:  :zombirolleye:


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“That wasn't any act of God. That was an act of pure human fuckery.”
― Stephen King, The Stand


#3
theglassintheguvseye

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....Until a mysterious stranger with demons of his own rides into our settlement, sees through my icy façade, and warms the heart I thought long dead...  Oh wait!  I'm not writing fanfic?  Sorry my bad!  :wallmad:  :zombirolleye:

Be careful what you wish for....  :P

 

And I feel bad about Michonne being an edit.  I, too understand her withdrawing from society for a while.  I also forgot the name of the bearded guy from S1 who saw his family ripped apart and died after the quarry attack.  He counts, too. And he was good at fixing the RV.  The one who dug the graves.


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#4
Serenity@sea

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Be careful what you wish for....  :P

 

And I feel bad about Michonne being an edit.  I, too understand her withdrawing from society for a while.  I also forgot the name of the bearded guy from S1 who saw his family ripped apart and died after the quarry attack.  He counts, too. And he was good at fixing the RV.  The one who dug the graves.

That was Jim. I was just thinking of him when Bob died because I saw some parallels there. They both had survivors guilt, I believe.

 

As far as how well I would do, I'd like to think I would be like current Carol, but honestly I'd probably be walker #777. Not so lucky in this case. haha


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#5
TangoJ

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I would be Creepy Clara, no doubt. 


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"Yeah, well, it could be a flower."

#6
Medic.

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I'd be the walker food someone was grieving over.


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#7
Musk of Ephesus

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I think I'd become a kind of Governor, but without the phony nice guy persona. I've always wanted to be a mad scientist ever since I was 3 and grew up fantasizing about being Dr. Moreau. I have a strong sense of empathy and determination, but if at all I judge you as an evil being, I can very easily departmentalize that empathy. So I could easily see myself letting go and becoming Gov. Moreau.


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